The introduction of intimacy coordinators to film and television production is relatively recent. After the explosion of the #MeToo movement in 2017, it became apparent that there needed to be much more thorough guidance and support to ensure actors are prepared and protected when approaching intimate scenes - consent being a primary focus. Australia has been leading the way, having since made the implementation of intimacy coordinators mandatory for productions across TV, film, and theatre. Shockingly, despite loud calls for change from actors unions, the rest of the entertainment industry worldwide has been slow to catch up.
When difficult themes such as sexual assault are on screen, as we see in One Night, the role of an intimacy coordinator is essential, facilitating a safe environment for the important conversations about boundaries and consent while ensuring the physical representations of the intimate connections are true and convincing. For many who find themselves in this role, they're all too familiar with the importance of that facilitation. Actor, performer, and body work practitioner Chloë Dallimore is one of them. For Chloë, her job is akin to a calling. And with a career in the industry spanning over 20 years, there's little doubt as to why she was the perfect choice for intimacy coordinator on One Night.
Last month, Read The Room co-editor Helena Emmanuel sat down with Chloë via Zoom for a fascinating chat about her role on set in One Night and what it means to be an intimacy coordinator. Her warmth and openness made it clear as to why she thrives in this job, and why, it seems to our team, she leaves every set better than she found it.
// Please be aware that, due to the themes represented in the TV series One Night such as sexual assault, PTSD and addiction, it was inevitable that some of those topics would be discussed in our interviews. //
Helena Emmanuel: Firstly, what got you involved in intimacy coordination? How did you find yourself here?
Chloë Dallimore: I was president of Actors Equity here in Australia for seven years. It’s a volunteer role, and as the president, you're very much ear-to-the-ground looking for the needs and what seems to be the current social focus for the industry as well as just the industrial aspect.
For a long time, the union had been getting reports of sexual harassment and bullying, but obviously actors didn't want to make official complaints because they wanted to keep being employed. After one particularly awful report involving someone with a high profile name, we said that in order to create change, we actually needed the statistics. We didn’t have any figures. So we did a survey of the membership and about half the membership filled out the survey, which is extraordinary. It was the highest response to a survey [we’d gotten]. Then the Harvey Weinstein case broke, and we had been about to wrap up the survey, but we thought, “Let's just keep it running to see what happens.” Around three quarters of the membership ended up filling it out, which is mind blowing. We said, “If people think they're going to be believed, they will speak up.” Not only were there people who were willing to speak up, but there were also people who were still afraid even when in an anonymous survey to say anything.
We were the first union in the world to have qualifiable and quantifiable data around sexual harassment and bullying, specifically in the performing arts landscape. The extraordinary thing was this was not just about [cisgender] women. This was about men, trans people, queer people – it was across the board. There was no one specific gender orientation or sexual orientation where it was worse than another. This is a massive problem across the whole of the industry, and the power struggle does tend to be in the director/billable actor area. That's where the issues seem to seem to be. So we were able to go, “Okay, so there's a power dynamic that is out of kilter. What can we start doing to actually create change?”
I found Ita O'Brien in the UK and Alicia Rodis and Claire Warden in the US. This was back in 2018 when they were coining the phrase ‘intimacy coordinator’. The Equity Foundation brought Ita O'Brien to Australia, and she did workshops around the country. We invited directors, actors, and people across all areas of the industry like casting directors and artistic directors of theatre companies to do her workshops, to be part of her presentations, to go, “Is this something Australia needs?” Of course, everyone went, “Okay, so this is a stunt coordinator for intimate scenes. Why haven't we done this before?”
I became obsessed because I’m a performer and then also I have another life as a body work practitioner, helping people recover from physical injury, trauma, et cetera. It was all my all my loves combining. I have a very strong sense of purpose. Every time I do this work, it's really embedded in the foundations of what our industry needed. I feel very lucky to carry all of those stories that I heard: the trauma, the pain, the desire to just do your job as a human in a workplace. I bring that to every job I do. I feel very lucky. It sort of feels like a social responsibility for me, doing this job. It feels much bigger than me. It's way bigger than me. It's a human thing.
HE: When we spoke to Bella Ridgway, she said a similar thing. She said it's like fight choreography. You know, if you have a fight, you have a stunt coordinator; if you have an intimate scene, why don't you have someone for that?
Chloë: [The girls] had really hard stuff. Not only was it the content, but [with Bridgette] we were in the bowels of a building. It was ominous. The energy of the space we were in was oppressive. I would not have wanted any human to have had to have re-lived that content. That's the thing: you're asking actors to embody emotions at a cellular level, and then we expect them just to shake it off afterwards.
[Intimacy coordinators] are probably on sets more now in Australia because there is an understanding - there's been a big push in our industry around mental health and wellbeing and the science around that. We feel very lucky.
HE: Getting into the show specifically, what were your initial reactions when you read the One Night scripts and saw what kind of content you had to work with?
Chloë: Sometimes you read scripts and you can feel that the person has written it as an observer, but this script felt lived in. That's what I like about the piece. You can't escape the reality of it. No one's had to make any of this up. So the messiness of family and children and what happens in family and friendship dynamics, it was very relatable.
That's the way that Emily (Ballou) wrote her story: in a way that we all felt we were living it in a real sense. You know, nothing was not believable. There was that feeling of "this is messy and relatable." Then it was, "Okay, how do the actors embody this in a way that's authentic but that they also don't take it home at the end of the day?"
HE: One of the questions that we’ve asked people, especially the actors, is about how they deal with living in this world and these characters’ trauma for so long, and how they honour the story and the characters while still protecting themselves. What does that mean to you as an intimacy coordinator?
Chloë: Separating character from actor. That's what we talk about when we're doing all of that intimate content. When I say intimate, it's not warm and fluffy intimacy [in this show]. It's intense and quite violent. That's the importance of the conversations as an IC (intimacy coordinator), is saying, "Right. So what are the character choices here?" They will always be different from what you, the human actor, would do in your life. So: identifying character choices and making sure [the actors] have a process of starting the day and existing in the day knowing that they're doing these as character choices. At the end of the day, getting out of that, everyone has slightly different ways of doing that, but that's also part of our job: to make sure that we help actors find ways to do that.
HE: How do you prepare for going on set and talking to actors about these things and helping them work this out?
Chloë: I make sure I am really prepared. I really need to know the content well and research the actors to get a sense of what their background is: are they a trained actor? What kind of content have they done before? I also have that same conversation with them. I've done as much research as I can so I’m able to be an empowered vessel, because I also have lived experience, so if there's [certain] content, I need to do work on myself before I can be on set. I've learned that the hard way, where I've gone into meetings where I haven't actually known what the production is about and it's caught me off guard. I've learned in those moments that preparation is key for me.
The majority of [intimacy coordinators’] work actually happens beforehand. Once we’re on set, I usually say, "If I look as if I'm doing nothing, it means I've done my job well." For example, for the scene down in the basement [with Young Simone and Young Trevor], I had individual actor chats to see how they felt about the scene so they could share anything they wanted to. Then we had Zoom chats with the two actors together and me, then we'd have director chats, then we had a rehearsal. So by the time they actually got on set, we've done all of that kind of preparatory work of why we're doing this scene and what's going on for the characters: what will the physicality be? What's the energy? What's the power play? Who's instigating what? We had basic blocking already in place.
So when I'm going on set, I'm actually very much keeping an eye on everyone and seeing where someone might need me to step in to just ask a question in order to open up conversation. You'll see actors trying to work out how a piece of costuming now works in relation to the choreography we've done, and when we're on set and there are 30 people waiting for the action to start, there's a sense of pressure. So sometimes people don't ask the questions they want to ask because they don't want to hold things up or they think they should know the answer.
You’ve got all the radar on. You've got your antennas up. DOPs (Directors of Photography) will sometimes catch my eye and say, "If they can just move their shoulder like that, then I can actually get that shot." So we’re kind of there for everyone. Once we're on set, I'm there for everyone pre-rehearsal. It's about the director, vision, actors, requirements, and chatting to all of the departments to make sure we all have the things that we need on the day, so it seems seamless. It seems effortless, hopefully.
HE: You touched on it a little bit in that answer, but how do you and a director work together? How much do you defer to them?
Chloë: It is always about the director. It's the director’s show; it's the director's vision.
My job is to offer up options, to be listening to what they actually would like out of the scene. Some directors are very specific: some directors will have storyboards and they're like, "Yep, everything that's in that storyboard. I want that physicality." So that's great. We do that. Others are going, "I want this kind of vibe," or, "These are my shots. I'm happy to adjust it." I am always deferring to the director and will say things like, "Not sure if it matters to you, but would you like more breath in that moment?" or "Do we need a different angle of the head?" and they will sometimes say, "Yeah, go do it," or sometimes they'll go, "No, we're not going to see that in the edit."
Our role should be egoless because it's not about us in any way, shape, or form. We're going in and facilitating conversations, making offers. Yes, we have training in biomechanics and how to make intimacy look authentic, but we are not the expert in terms of the shots or the filming. So it’s always collaborative. There have been directors who at first are like, "What are you here for?"
HE: [in her best grumpy director voice] "How dare you tell me how to block my actors!"
Chloë: Exactly. So I always say from the outset, "I'm not here to police. I have no interest in being a director. I'm here to facilitate your vision and conversations." It’s facilitation and collaboration which makes it so joyous because I can have all the care and conversations. Of course there's responsibility, but in the end it's the director who chooses the shots and decides whether they've gotten the shot they want.
In theatre, it's a slower process and can become very collaborative, which is wonderful because you've got a lot more time to rehearse and so on. On set, the director is the be all and the end all. I do absolutely remain deferential to the director.
HE: There are a couple of scenes specifically that our team was wondering about, based on our own viewing and the things other people we’ve interviewed have mentioned. One that you've already talked about a bit is the scene with Young Simone and Young Trevor when he assaults her in the basement. What kind of conversations are you having with the actors to prep for that? Do you approach that kind of scene differently than a one that's not about sexual assault?
Chloë: One of my first questions is usually, "How are you feeling about this scene?" Then I can get a gauge literally on how they're feeling about the scene. What's interesting is we often think about the person who's the receiver of the act. We think about them but then we forget that the actor playing Trevor – that is so far from his personality. He's such a beautiful young man. I would sit with him as he talked about how he was feeling, and then, throughout the shoot I just kept checking in on him because it's a horrific thing to portray. But he did it. He did it really well. That's what's so extraordinary. I went, as I was watching the final cut, "Oh my God, people would never think he is the delightful young man that he is".
In these scenes, I absolutely am wanting to know what I need to watch out for and if I need to watch out for anything in regards to the human actor's response whilst filming. It’s about just empowering them, making sure that they can do their best work. They've chosen to do the work; they've chosen to do the job in the knowledge that there are those scenes, so this is not about padding them in cotton wool and avoiding the scene. It's about, "What do we need to make sure you can go to that place that you know you've done your best work that day to be that character." So sometimes it's an ongoing conversation.
When it actually gets to the day of filming, I will tend to say things like, "Is there anything that you would like me to be on alert for? Do we need any stop action words? Do we need anything? Do we need to put anything in place?" That’s like a little safety net underneath, and actors will sometimes say, "I'm going to say, 'I'm going to have a cup of tea over in the off set.' That's my soothing thing when I feel my nervous system elevating. So if I ask you for a cup of tea, can you just pause things for a moment?" So we'll find ways of ensuring that they get what they need to have a little moment without it being, "STOP! We just need to stop! Everyone stop action!", so it doesn't become dramatic. It’s just about being respectful of the human and going, "You are going to do a great job. How do we put things in place in case you need a moment?" Interestingly, when we have that safety net, you usually don't need it. But because you've talked about it and they know that there's someone in the space who is aware that if they need a moment they can have one, things tend to go smoothly.
I always try to bring laughter, and we do playground hand games to tap into sort of, you know, we do stuff that brings levity and relief as well, because you can't stay in that heavy place. You've got to flip in and out of that in order to be authentic.
It's just keeping the conversations going and staying in a positive place.
HE: I would imagine too that having gone over that choreography, they lose that layer of "Oh god, does everyone think that this is what I would do? I have to come up with this!?" Like, that’s just not there.
Chloë: Exactly. Also that your fellow actor is not thinking, "Oh my god, is Chloë putting her hand there because she wants to put her hand there? No, we've talked about it." And, "Is it okay for you if I place my hand here, like a two out of five touch? Does that feel okay?" "Actually could you squeeze a little bit firmer so I can react?"All of those conversations get had, and then they can just act on top of it. The other beauty is that it means it's repeatable. So for DOPs and directors and continuity, they're like, "Yay! No one's winging it. They're not just making it up as they go!" Otherwise it’s like, a hand went there and now it went there and now the hair went there and you see continuity going, "Oh my God. How are we going to do this?" They kind of know where body parts are going to be in space, and the DOPs know what's going to go on as well. Then it's just about the acting choices.
HE: When we spoke with Lisa Matthews and Kat Stewart, they talked about working with you for the scene in the last episode, where Vicki and Tess kiss on the balcony. What does your work look like for that kind of moment?
Chloë: Yeah, absolutely. People often say, "Oh, it's just a kiss." Anytime someone says a sentence that says "just", there's a problem. If there's a kiss scripted, it's there for a reason. It's part of the storytelling. So what we're always doing in those moments is saying, "What do we want the audience to think or feel when they see that kiss?" We're also determining whether it's actually the action of the kiss that is saying the most, or if it’s the lead into it. Or is it all of those things? We're asking questions like, who instigates the kiss? What brings the bodies together? Is it one body that holds still while the other moves in? Or is it a combination of that? How long is it? What's the intensity? What is being said? Why are the lips together? What's the intensity of the connection of the lips? Is there one person resisting the other? What's the power play within the kiss whilst they're connected? Why does it stop? Why does it end? Is it that someone else walks in the balcony door or does one of them change their mind? Is the scene ending?’ So we pull that kiss apart quite forensically, so it's like a monologue in itself. That's what we did with that.
It's always confronting to kiss someone that you wouldn't usually choose to kiss, so let's work out why they're kissing. Actors, even with the experience of Jodie and Kat, were like, "Oh, we hadn't thought about it like that!" So it's so wonderful to watch the actors’ brains going, "Well, maybe it's this," or, "I'm actually thinking this…," and the other is going, "Well, I'm thinking that..." It seems so simple, the coming together of two faces, but it's actually deeply complex.
HE: Was there a scene, either a type of scene generally or a scene in One Night, that you were most nervous about? Or on the flip side, one that you were excited about?
Chloë: The one with Simone at the party. Nicole Da Silva[‘s character] took herself to a party and then she was having sex with a random person at the party in the hallway.
HE: And she’s crying.
Chloë: Yeah! That was really interesting. Those kinds of moments can be really tricky because there's a default place that you could go to where it's like, you could picture it, a character having sex against a wall. It's definitely not a picture we've not seen before. But it was about working it out with Emily (Ballou) in the space. There was so much conversation that [Nicole and Emily] were having around that. The importance of Emily being there and the benefit of having her there was [apparent in] the scene. I saw it pay off massively because Nicole was wrestling with different ways to play the way she came into the hallway and why Simone was doing this.
I find those things that could be really kind of pedestrian, really interesting to work on. Just the energy of what the actor is thinking and what's being picked up on camera can change one of those scenes from being like, "Oh, she's having sex with someone in a hallway. Right," to making us think, "Oh, Simone, really?" Or, "Oh God, of course that's what you do." So they're the kind of scenes that I often find surprise me in that on paper you go, "Okay, logistically it's just two bodies. Right." But the complexity of what it's actually saying depends on all the people in the room: actor, writer, director, DOP. Then I'm just sprinkling stuff in there to make all of that work.
So that was one of the most rewarding [scenes], to see Nicole unsure and really wanting to make that moment speak for what Emily wanted it to say without it becoming vanilla in its portrayal or heteronormative. She really wanted to bring in the rawness and make us want to know more about Simone. Because at that point in the story, we could just go, "Oh, she's just a bit Jatz." Like she – Jatz crackers. It's a type of biscuits –
HE: Okay, gotcha.
Chloë: – like, "She's a little bit crazy". We still want people to care about her to keep following her journey. Nicole didn't want people to think that Simone was just really damaged and irresponsible.
HE: Yeah, that was a really difficult scene to watch. It's not very long, but it made me like, "Oh, god, oh no".
Chloë: Exactly!
HE: Is there a type of scene, again either broadly or in One Night, that people might not expect an intimacy coordinator to have worked on?
Chloë: Yes! I was also there for the beach scene where all the teens were dancing, etc. There were quite a lot of background actors, and I do a lot of work with extras who are setting a scene, because often there are things required of them that are intimate. So in that beach scene, there were teenagers hugging and falling into one another and dancing together and so on. Some of those extras are not necessarily trained actors, and many of them were younger actors as well. So I go there and remind them and give them a professional process to make sure that whilst they'll have a great time doing it, that for any contact they have with the other person, they're checking that that's okay. Making sure that they know that what they are doing with the other person is a character choice.
People probably wouldn't think that there would be anyone needed other than a director, but because of the close proximity of those extras and also because we had a couple of people that were underage, under 16, it’s then my duty of care to make sure that they understand expectations and that that's passed on to their guardian, and all of that sort of thing.
Also there were some things when [Tess, Vicki, Helen, Lily, and Art] were together as a family, and helping the younger actors work on what relationship and family intimate touch looks like, because family touch is very different from friendship touch, from lover touch. So we work in all of those realms to make the family look authentic and to make any background actors also look authentic.
Words: Alfie Whitby
Interview: Helena Emmanuel (with questions submitted by the RTR team)
You can watch One Night on Paramount+ UK & Ireland and Paramount+ Australia now.
Read The Room is a volunteer run magazine! Enjoyed reading our articles and content? Please consider supporting us on ko-fi to help us cover the cost of running the website!
----------